Hanging in and Holding On
And what this has to do with scent and death.
I sit and write this to you today not knowing exactly what to say. With only days until the Presidential election here in the U.S., my mind is racing and my anxiety is in overdrive. Whether you live in the U.S. or not, this election will affect us all.
I don’t mean to project these feelings onto you. My sincere apologies. I’ve never felt the weight of the world as deeply as I do now. What will my young adult sons witness and what kind of future can we women expect? There’s much to fear, but I live in hope.
Which got me thinking about death. Death? Not exactly an uplifting subject, I know. But please hear me out.
I don’t like to think about death. Most of us don’t. But it’s going to happen to everybody. As the saying goes, “only two things in life are certain, death and taxes.”
But then it occurred to me that today is Día de los Muertos, a Mexican holiday (also celebrated by many in the U.S.) that involves family and friends gathering to pay respects and remember those who’ve died. It’s a chance to celebrate and honor the people who’ve meant something to you. It’s a joyful day of remembrance: eating the deceased's favorite foods and drinks, telling stories of fond memories, and displaying beautifully bright flowers to reflect their love.
While I didn’t grow up with this tradition, I love the idea. It’s a way of recognizing that death doesn’t have to be final, but rather another phase of the journey. I’ve talked to friends who celebrate and they tell me it’s a very festive and uplifting experience. And, as a result, they don’t fear death as much as I do. I’m assuming it’s because they confront the idea at least once a year.
I also learned that burning incense is an important part of the day. Specifically copal is burned, which is a resin from the Protium copal tree. The incense is often placed on the ofrenda, an altar of offerings, to help the spirits find the living, and draws them close, while candles help light the way. It’s no surprise that scent, in this case incense, has been a part of the death experience since ancient times.
Here a quote from an older Mexican woman via DeathScent.com:
This [Día de Los Muertos] is quintessentially Mexican; it has to smell Mexican. My family is buried in this soil, with these trees and plants and rain. I want to connect to them and they are part of this place, so it has to smell like this place. It has to smell like home.“
So, with all this in mind, I leave you with hope. Because, as Fyodor Dostoevsky says, “To live without hope is to cease to live.” Let us hope that all goes well next Tuesday.
This week on my podcast An Aromatic Life:
In this week's whiff of wisdom, writer, perfumer and community organizer Nuri McBride shares why she believes we, as a Western society, reject scent just like we deny the reality of death. In fact, we can use scent to help us embrace the inevitability of death more willingly, and she’ll explain how.
To listen to the original full episode go to episode #67.
You can hear this episode and many more on Apple podcast, Spotify, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Looking for a holiday gift for the young child in your life?
No Place for Plants is a vibrantly illustrated children's picture book that tells the story of a modern day 8-year-old Native American girl from Los Angeles, California named Pukuu’ who is on a mission to save her community garden.
Every Sunday, Pukuu', her wise grandmother Ashuuk, and their pet desert tortoise Paa'ar walk to their community garden to spend time with their friends, including the plants, animals, and insects. But one Sunday, as they are walking to the garden, smelling the plants along the way, they arrive there to find some no-good, absolutely terrible news that could change everything.
Pukuu’, with the guidance of Ashuuk and Paa'ar, embark on an unforgettable journey that reminds us of the importance of community and our connection to Nature.
The hardcover, paperback, and e-book are available for purchase globally on Amazon, Walmart, and Barnes & Noble.
Beautifully written. Thanks 🙏🏿